Show No Insecurity
An old writing client recently wrote, “I have a big meeting the following week with potential buyer/maker-happener and that wrecks me. I guess it’s exactly the same as auditioning for a part you really want. Any insights to send me in with???”
I responded, “Here’s the thing re that meeting. You have something THEY want. You will ONLY sell it to them if you’re in the moooooooood to sell it because you don’t neeeeeeeeeeeeeed to sell it. You MIGHT sell it. You might NOT. YOU are in charge. I know you THINK you’re HAVE to sell, but that is the exact stance that puts you at a disadvantage. Remember: your product will HELP them. If they want to HELP themselves, they will buy your fabulous product. If they want to continue suffering without your product, that’s their business. You don’t NEED them. You are a lovely, kind person who is taking time out of her fabulous, busy day to meet with them to see if you can help them be less miserable. KEEP THE POWER. DANGLE the CARROT. If they say, “We think your script is too x,” you respond, “Oh, that’s too bad. Everyone else seems to love the xness. So and So and Such and Such particularly commented on it. But hey, if it’s not for you, that’s ok. I hope you find what you’re looking for. Have a wonderful day.”
She wrote back, “It helps, I just don’t know if I have it in me to pull it off. The picture-them-naked thing NEVER works for me.”
So I sent her this amazing quote I heard from my teacher Tej (who came so highly recommended by many, including Angelique C and Courtney P) at Golden Bridge today. I think Yogi Bhadjan says it a LOT better. Don’t you?
Yogi Bhajan – 7/4/89 – “Show No Insecurity”:
Be in command. The statement is, “Be in gainful command.” Your posture should not be aggressive or shallow. It should be gracious, slightly bright, self contained. There is one thing every woman should learn. Show no insecurity. This is a key to royalty. If you take on this conscious behavior in forty days, seventy percent of your problems will be gone. Just show no insecurity, even if you are deadly insecure. “God, he is going to tell me to get out of the house, ‘pack up, you bitch’.” Show no insecurity even then. Men love that kind of woman.
You may be beautiful, intelligent, rich, working, supporting, and blindly in love, but show insecurity and you are done. Man by nature is a super insecure idiot. It is true, believe me. This whole macho thing unbuttoned shirt and all that, is make-up. This is a rat who growls like a lion. First of all you do not know how to be mad, then you get mad and you don’t know how to get out of it. In one second men are dead mad and the next minute they ask you out for dinner.
Don’t try to “not” do things.
So I’ve been in Alison’s clinic and last week she said to me – just do what you want – whenever you don’t edit yourself it’s always fun. Don’t try to “not” do things – like trying to not be too theatrical, etc.. Tonight Trisha was our sub…. So I did the West Wing scene with all kinds of “don’t be too…” thoughts. Then I did it again and I thought – what the heck – fire. I’ll just do what I want (thank you Alison:). So I explode onto the scene and Trisha stops me one line in and says – I love it – but I think your essence is a little quirkier than hers. Then she says, “She’s nerdier than you.” Bingo. Instantly I knew how to adjust and the whole scene was so much better than the first time. It took me showing Trisha “what I had” or “who I am” or “what I thought about what was happening in the scene” for her to know what kind of adjustment to give me. It’s like a specific application of the dare to suck principle. When I do what I want, put it all out there, it may not be “right,” it may be totally wrong but it shows people what I’ve got and then they have more to work with.
Love Letter
I got a love letter from a client today. I am the happiest acting teacher on the PLANET. I’m done now. I can call it a day.
Thank you, Eric Nenninger.
I had been a Kahn-vert for 2 1/2 years when last spring I booked a re-curring role on a single camera comedy pilot that was eventually picked up for series. Nine more episodes started shooting in the fall. Hallelujah. Now, you always hear stories of re-curring roles getting bigger because the actor playing them is ‘so amazing we had to write him in.’ This time I was part of that story. The show is about college and my character was supposed to graduate at the end of the year, leaving room for the lead and MY girlfriend to start dating. In short, now it’s not gonna happen for them. Sorry lead guy, there’s plenty of fish in the sea. Here’s how it happened and what I learned from it.
I originally went in on this project for a different role and, after killing it, the CD said ‘They want a black guy (I’m not black). Here take this other role out in the hall and come back when you’re ready.’ I had already read the script, of course, and knew the role. I took it downstairs and SLOWLY read everything on the page. I made strong, text based choices that would serve the script and make my character charming, specific and, of course, funny. This took about 30 min. When I came back in, it was effortless and since it was re-curring, I didn’t need to test and was booked off tape. Bang!
First and foremost I was perfect for the part. I’m pretty much playing myself which you can’t do anything about. Second, I didn’t go in the hall to ‘get ready’. I came to the audition ready. I had been reading and working on sides that SUCKED for 2 1/2 years so cutting through a role that I was perfect for, was easy. I could hear what it needed to be because my ear and my instincts were already in tune, and so was my instrument, when it came time to play.
I was busy for the table read of the pilot (I know, I’m so big time) so when I showed up on set it was the first time the producers had ever met me. No pressure. Thankfully my camera technique was sharp because I’ve done a few things and had recently been making short films and webisodes with some friends. My role in the pilot was small, but I didn’t take anything lightly. I mined every word and scene for as much gold as I could find. Looking for every opportunity to make my character more of a real person. I used the ‘white spaces’ on the page to do it. To my surprise the director/creator were also open to new ideas. Hallelujah. An actor’s dream. Because I understood the comedy and story that was being told, from years of watching television shows, my ideas fit like a residual check. I made a few key changes in the relationships with ad-libs and improvs that caused my character to ‘fit in’ more. Several people would tell me later, including people from the network, that when I did such and such, it really made my character three-dimensional. “Oh really?! I didn’t even notice that I was making my part bigger. Fancy that!”
I was LUCKY that my OPPORTUNITY met my PREPARATION. I think I’ve read that somewhere.
So we start the series and a couple re-curring roles are bumped up to series-regular. Not me. Who cares? I know how the industry works. One guy had another gig and there was a chance he would not be available. Another was a minority and the network needed it. Who cares? I know how the industry works. I got an open door in front of me and I’m not going to try and fit jealousy through it. I’m going to think of myself as a series-regular anyway, so what’s a title? (We’ll get to the money thing later.)
At the first table read, after the show got picked up, it seemed like every employee from the network was there. The night before I was reading the script that was, and forever will be, a work in progress. I see a couple jokes of mine that, in my egotistical opinion, could be better. A “three” that is not completed, a button here and there. Nothing major. I know not to change what the writer wrote, the structure of the story, just the flavor of the jokes. I also know that the table read is HUGE and I want to bring my A-game so I say FUCK IT. I add my “three” and buttons and they get HUGE laughs cause my ear is in tune and so is my instrument. Then comes the payoff. When I get the re-write of the script sent to my house (I know, I’m so big time) my ad-libs MADE THE RE-WRITE! Almost nothing compares to that. I’m collaborating!
We when started shooting I had the confidence that what I was doing was working so I kept at it. I never took anything lightly. From first rehearsal all the way through the final shot I was looking for new jokes and new ideas that connected to the script, which I knew inside and out. Not because I had read it 20 times, but because I’ve read so many scripts that I can pick up on almost all of it with just two reads. I was making sure that each take I was hearing and thinking for the first time. Not repeating performances and not settling for good enough. I knew that every minute was an opportunity to shine or fade. I also had a strong personal instinct for what was good and what wasn’t. Even when people were telling me how great everything was. On-set, everything is hilarious, great, sooo wonderful until it airs and it sucks, or worse, is mediocre. You need a higher standard for yourself, much higher. I knew what was possible with the material because in the yellow room I had seen crap shine.
The amount of re-writes on this show became a joke…funnier than most of the writing. It was ridiculous. We used to say that the final revision would be out, right after the episode aired. It was a nightmare learning your lines and making them funny only to have them change when you got to set. For me though, it was a dream. I knew how to instantly learn new material because I could see what the writers were going for. I had worked on so much material and been given so many adjustments it never really threw me. The writers were on set too, so I could talk with them about the jokes and pitch new ideas to them with a great handle on the genre that we were working under. We would talk about different styles of shows and the jokes they used. I knew all about it cause I had watched hundreds of hours of TV and seen every possible show out there. I could feel the new joke they were going for and could see why it had been changed without really trying. My right brain took care of it. That freed up my left brain to think of alternates for it on the spot. With each episode I saw my character get more defined and I was part of that process. I started showing up to work with the attitude and responsibility that my job was to add to the script and the show, not just paint the numbers on the page.
My part started to grow.
With each new episode we had a table read on our lunch hour. All the producers and writers as well as people from the network would attend our little performance of the next episode. We wouldn’t get the script till that morning, so you would have time to read it once before we started shooting scenes for the day. “Thank GOD I go to LK,” I would tell my wife on table read days. My cast was great and responsible so everyone would read the scripts and make good choices, but I knew how to work faster than them so my performances would be more specific and therefore, funnier. One day they asked me if I would also read the part of a major guest-star who wouldn’t be attending. I know not to take anything lightly so I said FUCK IT and jumped in with both sides of my brain. It went great. I could sense the jokes that were written; turns, builds, point of views and all. I would later learn from a writer at the wrap party that at these table reads was where I really made my mark on the show. After the read it was bac
k to shoot the rest of the day.
By now I was working six-seven days an episode, on average 12 hours a day. I figured I was in the process of ‘acting’, i.e., reading, rehearsing, thinking or actually shooting, about seven of those hours. There is a certain amount of fatigue that goes along with that but I had been rehearsing, reading and in class four-five days a week already, so getting to that level wasn’t as hard. I also would sit around for three hours then act at 11 pm or later and was expected to be brilliant on cue, but I knew that was coming. I had done that in the yellow room dozens of times.
We had new directors for each episode. One day I finished an episode in the morning with a director who would ask me how my character felt about the scene and then started a new episode in the afternoon with a director who said ‘sit on this word, look left on that one, and take out the huh.’ (Those notes came in the first read.) But I’ve learned how to be director-proof and can adjust on a dime. I know my work is not precious and will try any new idea just for the hell of it. I’m specific and consistent.
So now, I’m an invaluable part of the show. The story line has changed to include my character. I watched as other series-regulars’ roles got smaller, while mine got bigger. They get paid, probably double, to do one scene in an episode. Partly because their characters didn’t have any room to grow. I was blessed to have a role that had room in it and would rather have the screen time than the cash. (For this season at least.) But also partly because they didn’t see what was passing them by with each scene that we shot. A friend of mine on the show, who also understood this, had a running joke with me where I would ask him if he had any lines in this scene and he would say “not yet.”
It worked. It worked because I had put in SO MUCH WORK before I got there that the choices almost made themselves. I could hear what it needed to be and I could feel how it should go, in the moment, without really knowing why. My right brain had absorbed so much creativity at the studio and my left brain had contemplated every angle that when I got to set, they sang in harmony. It was beautiful and I’m a terrible singer.
So what did I learn?
It works.
and…
…she’s right.
Everything, EVERYTHING that Les does in class and at the studio is set up to help us succeed when we get on set. It allows us to live our dreams and be a part of that story where the show changes to include you. Everything from the obnoxious assignments with material that is crap, to that beautifully shrieking Jewish voice saying “STOP!!!” To the snacks in the kitchen that are like Kraft Services, to the astronomically high expectations on performance and adjustments, to the therapy sessions to get you out of your head, is in place so you can live your dream. Every time I knew how to handle a situation it was because we had gone over it or talked about it or it was screamed into my head a hundred times in class before. I used everything that she taught me everyday on set. Her voice was in my head, like it’s in all of ours, all day. Saying ‘make it specific, slow down, stop trying to repeat, dare to suck and get out of your left brain, NENNINGER!!!! (Maybe that last part is just in my head.)
Thanks, Lesly.
Sincerely,
Eric Nenninger
Not So Fab, III
Here’s the third installment in my Thursday night class’s responses to why their work in class was so not fabulous the week before last. The pink highlit stuff is what they deduced they did to cause the not-such-great work. The blue stuff is the solution.
Someone wrote, “. . . my distrust in myself and my bad thoughts about myself are in my way. Instead of saying “ I can,” I immediately go to “I don’t know if I can.” . . . I feel like I have to be perfect with everything I do. When I see something that I don’t immediately “get” or understand, I worry. I agonize over it because I HAVE to do well. Then I start beating myself up because I either (a) think that I can’t do it and that makes me sad or (b) I know I’m being hard on myself and that’s lame. When I read the sides for last week’s assignment, this is what happened in my brain: “Oh, this script is cute and I totally fit the breakdown. Wait, a second. Do we have to do the scene where she’s in labor? Oh my God. Oh, no. I don’t know if I can do that. What if it doesn’t come out right? I’ve never had to do something like that in front of a group of people. What if I don’t end up committing and look like an idiot? I don’t want to do a bad job.” And then I cried. Then I got mad because What the FUCK? This is supposed to be fun. Why am I investing so much time and energy into something that does this to me? And then I say, Well, I didn’t have enough time to do it anyway. Time is huge for me. I feel like I don’t ever have enough of it, but I have a really hard time making the time to sit on the couch. And if I don’t make the time, a lot of time, I freak out and go through these traumatizing thoughts. Clearly those thoughts have nothing to do with the character and then the work doesn’t happen or it comes out of my weird ego place. And when my mind goes to that place of why I am pursuing this? Where is the joy in this? This is not who I am. I start thinking about the bigger picture—how I’m in my late twenties now and my resume isn’t that big. How I’ve been on seven theatrical auditions this year, all of them being co star roles. How I hate my waitressing job and what it does to my heart. And then I get even more pissed about everything. So I say fuck it. Shut up already, you’re fine. I gotta walk away from thinking about it. For now. Until this happens again. Next week. . . . I’m anxiety driven, I have a terrible time making decisions, and I am so fucking hard on myself, it’s demoralizing. The good news is I’m aware of all of this now. . . . I know certain things . . . I can’t ever not be in therapy. I always have to do some form of yoga. I need the beach on a regular basis. I am not allowed to set foot in my restaurant more than four shifts a week. And I need to be in class so that I can be inspired to step outside of this shit so that I can eventually do what I want for my career. . . . Last week, I got stuck in my bad actor thoughts. I didn’t quite make it full circle. I decided to say Fuck it, but I wasn’t grounded enough in the work for the dare to suck to really be worth it.”
SO AMAZING. SHE HAS NO FAITH HERSELF YET FEELS SHE HAS TO BE PERFECT. SHE WON’T DO COUCH TIME AND THUS CAN’T DO CHARACTER THOUGHTS, SO SHE FAILS AND THEN PANICS THAT SHE’S FAILING. BUT SHE KNOWS SHE NEEDS TO TALK ABOUT IT, CONNECT HER MIND AND BODY, GET SOME POSITIVE IONS, SERVE PEOPLE AS INFREQUENTLY AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE AND KEEP WORKING AT IT. FANFREAKINGTASTIC, N’EST CE PAS?
Recovery
Following are excerpts from an email convo I had with a fellow addict – I thought all you other addicts out there (alcohol, drugs, food, sex, what have you) might find it insightful . . . My comments are in CAPS.
Dear Les,
. . . I [am in recovery, as you know, but I still] totally binge from time to time. Sometimes I [even] binge when I look at material. Or [at least] need to eat something. Because I used to do it with a jack and coke next to me. Because I used to do it with a pack of cigs next to me. And because if I’m doing that, and feel the guilt, shame, remorse, etc. associated with that, then I can’t get hurt when you tell me I did a bad job, or I don’t get a gig, etc. etc. Because I wasn’t at my best anyway. If I was, it would have been totally different, right?
When I was in school, I never tried. I got As and Bs, but never really applied myself. And at that level of commitment, I couldn’t get hurt. So [the big question is] what happens if I do apply myself and it still doesn’t work out?
WELL, I GUESS, AT LEAST THEN YOU KNOW. EVENTUALLY. I MEAN YOU CAN’T TAKE ONE TIME OF REALLY APPLYING YOURSELF AND CALL THAT RESULT THE ANSWER. BUT I GUESS IF YOU REALLY APPLY YOURSELF FOR A LONG TIME AND STILL SUCK, THAT’S THE ANSWER, RIGHT? WHICH IS, OF COURSE, NOT REMOTELY THE CASE WITH YOU, SEE BELOW.
This is just how I think I’ve viewed the world for most of my life. I don’t know if it’s everybody else’s. I could feel the anxiety last night as I got the material [to prepare for class], and started going over it, and realized how deep it was. Thoughts of grabbing a snack and/or saying “fuck it” both popped in my head. But I hung in and went through it the way we do. And maybe that didn’t alter my performance a whole lot.
BUT IT DID. DON’T YOU REMEMBER? YOU WERE PRETTY GREAT FOR THE WHOLE FIRST HALF, BUT THEN YOU WENT INTO A STATE OF BEING. AND EVEN A STATE OF BEING IS 100% BETTER THAN WHAT YOU USED TO DO — WHICH WAS JUST KINDA AKT.
But I do believe it altered the way I took the note. Because I actually understand where I had gone astray by playing a state of being. For
what felt like the first time, even though I know I’ve gotten that note before. I was actually really trying to make sure I stayed committed thru the scene.
EXACTLY! AND YOU DID!!!!
I know a year ago I would have held back in an attempt to look good, so I’m glad that commitment wasn’t the issue.
My sponsor says something about the eating thing that I think holds true for any negative behavior. He says “if you are going to eat the bear claw, enjoy the fucking bear claw.” Because eventually it’ll cause me enough pain and distress that I’ll admit I’m powerless to it, surrender, ask for help, and do the work necessary to be rid of the desire to eat bear claws. Or the desire to play a state of being instead of listening.
“Dare to suck,” gets deeper and deeper the more I apply it to my acting.
Notes From Intensive Hosting Reports – By Rachel Q
From Rachel Q’s First Week of Intensive Hosting Report:
LESLY’S COMMENTS ARE IN CAPS
. . . A lot of our focus was on how big to go with it, how big is too big, etc, so we tried it every which way. We went from huge, over the top, and almost uncomfortably exaggerated, to very minimal. Dana was worried about being too big and ridiculous looking. I personally thought her big ones were more interesting, and the minimal ones were a bit boring. We rediscovered that the stakes absolutely have to be high for it to be funny, and even if you think you look like a clown, you probably don’t. You don’t know where “Too Big” is until you try it. Dare to suck!
YES, AND “BIG” IS A MISNOMER. THERE IS NO “TOO BIG” IF YOUR CHOICES ARE TEXT BASED AND GROUNDED IN THE REALITY OF THE SITUATION. IF I’M CLEANING UP THE HOUSE FOR COMPANY AND BOB LEAVES HIS SOCKS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FLOOR, I’M GONNA FUH-REAK OUT AT HIM. IF, ON THE OTHER HAND, IT’S A NORMAL DAY, AND I HAVEN’T BEEN RUNNING AROUND LIKE A CRAZY PERSON COOKING AND CLEANING, AND THEN I SEE HIS SOCKS ON THE FLOOR, I’LL JUST PICK ‘EM UP AND PUT ‘EM IN THE LAUNDRY BASKET, AND PROBABLY SMILE WHILE I DO IT. FOLLOW? STAKES AND TEXT BASEDNESS AND REALITY. MAKE SENSE?
. . . With June, we explored how big can she be and conversely, how small/straight can she be compared to Caitlyn, trying it a bunch of different ways.
I WOULD LOVE YOU NOT TO THINK IN TERMS OF RESULT, I.E., BIG AND SMALL.
Excerpts From ‘Legend & Groundbreaker: John Lasseter’ By Peter Debruge – Variety, August 26, 2009
I was reading an article about Pixar founder John Lasseter and ended up impregnating myself. (Yes, I am that big a Pixar slut!) I was so inspired by this article I wanted to post some chunks of it here for all y’all. Now, some of you may find yourself reading this stuff and thinking, “This has nothing to do with acting or what we learn here at the Kahnstitute, why the hell am I reading about cartoons?” On the Kahntrary…
See, it’s all about that legendary mantra of Lesly‘s, DARE TO SUCK! Choosing to see failure as a wrung on the ladder to success rather than an emergency stop button! Knowing and trusting exactly who you are as opposed to holding yourself up at gun point and robbing yourself of your beautiful truth by “trying” to “be” what “they want!” JE-ZUS, can you imagine a balding, overweight, self-proclaimed geek in horrid floral shirts as the head of, like, one of the most successful movie studios in history?! No imagination needed- his name’s John Lasseter. And he’s got some of the greatest unintentional advice for actors EVER (in my overly humble opinion)!
Playing. Fucking around. Bouncing ideas off every inch of each other. Try-try-trying EVERYTHING to make the work FUN. (Kinda like couch time! Rehearsing! Coaching!) Read the excerpts below. They dominate. The full article can be found right about… HERE! (And if you want some additional background on Pixar and their bodaciousness, click HERE!) Enjoy, mo fos! – Scott Borden, Editor
“The key to John Lasseter’s success? Failure. He admits the mantra that sets the studio apart: ‘It’s safe to fail.’
“We fail a lot,” admits “Toy Story 3″ director Lee Unkrich. “We just don’t fail by the time the movie comes out. John would be the first to tell you that every movie we’ve made has been at one point the biggest piece of garbage we’ve ever worked on.’
“Lasseter believes… in what he calls the ‘creative brain trust’ at Pixar, a peer-support strategy in which all the directors and key story people from around the company get together and selflessly help on one another’s films. ‘It doesn’t matter whose idea it is, the best idea gets used,’ he explains.
“‘When you think about science, it’s about experimentation, and 99% of the experiments fail, but you learn from the failures and you move on… always wanting to keep pushing, keep experimenting, keep trying, and we always learn and keep moving forward.’
“For all the technical advances that have impressed audiences about Pixar, Lasseter’s greatest innovation has been to extend a principle of positive risk-taking to the creative process. Lasseter’s approach applies at both studios [in addition to his post at Pixar, he recently became head of Disney Feature Animation], where he has introduced virtual safety nets to protect small failures from compromising an entire project.
“He is adamant that teams not be allowed to sequester themselves or work too long without sharing their progress with others. No matter what state a project is in, every three months, directors are required to put their film up on reels and test how it screens. That way, Lasseter and his fellow leaders can identify problems early…
“With this summer’s ‘Up,’ Pixar achieves a perfect 10-for-10 winning streak — a feat unheard of in Hollywood, where a 1-in-10 hit ratio keeps most companies in business.
“‘The trick is to make those mistakes as quickly as possible and move on, a philosophy Lasseter picked up from colleague and computer science pioneer Ed Catmull (the man who lured him to Lucasfilm Computer Graphics Group after Lasseter lost his job at Disney in 1983 — the setback that has paid off best in Lasseter’s career).
“‘Animation is the most collaborative art form there is in the whole world,’ continues Lasseter, who says his goal at both Pixar and Disney Animation has been ‘to build a studio where everyone’s working for the same thing, to make the best movie you can, and then to be open enough to let people put their two cents into it. The next thing you know, you’re seeing stuff you would never have thought of yourself.’
“‘No shortage of bad ideas emerges, of course, but the environment is designed to be supportive enough that people feel encouraged to speak up and take creative chances.
“‘Back when we were first taking over TOY STORY 2 and trying to fix it, I had a conversation with Steve Jobs expressing our concerns,’ Unkrich says. ‘He reassured me by telling me that when he looked back on his career, all the work he was most proud of was done under circumstances just like that, where it seemed impossible, where there wasn’t enough time, there wasn’t enough money, but everyone had set the bar really high for themselves. That’s success.’
Quotes From Intensive Hosting Reports!
Lauren B says:
“For the first time I saw how just reacting to what you just heard or saw leaves you no choice but to dare to suck. If you are really in the scene, and someone does something off the wall, your thoughts drive you and take over and you just give it right back.”
“We also did ‘thoughts from the couch,’ which always seems to help. The pressure is off somehow and the judgment of the thoughts is gone because they aren’t your own, yet, the spontaneity is there and we could really see stuff take on new life…which oddly gives you the confidence and freedom to just HAVE your own thoughts.”
Ian N adds:
“I really like thoughts from the couch. They’re a great way to get out of your head and react “IN THE MOMENT.” It’s good to be the person giving the thoughts ‘cause you really have to pay close attention to the scene and have your own thoughts while the scene moves along.”
Today’s Fortune Cookie…
Today’s Fortune Cookie says:
“He who can laugh at himself will never run out of things to laugh at; he who cannot is obviously not daring to suckey-suckey and needs an ass whoopin’. Dare To Suck!”
It’s Time To Just Jump, Folks…
Quick prerequisite for how all this’ll shoelace together (a) at all, and (b) into our acting: I have a strand of thrill seeking that runs throughout my being and I’ve had two skydiving trips cancelled due to weather conditions in recent years. Got it? Okay -
We got a new guy in my Ongoing Class who has very quickly jumped onto my Mount Rushmore of Bad Asses to Look Up To – Geoff R. The girls melted over him like butter on Belgian Waffles, so you know the guy’s a stud right there. Cool, friendly guy, good actor, cool, right? So last week we did atypical mid-month auditions. After auditioning, I strolled back to the green room as the other guys were in the midst of a story he was telling. As I sat down, I heard someone mention skydiving and, being an expert, immediately joined them. Geoff mentioned that he had dived solo in this tale of his which, in skydiving, is big; you have to dive strapped to instructors many many many times before you are granted that opportunity. So I think, “Jesus, the guy’s probably jumped two dozen times!”
Wrong. Try close to seven hundred jumps. Try record-setting jumper. Try all over the world, news, movies, everything. That’s part of how he makes his living, actually. Aside from test driving sports cars (yes, he does that too), he’s a diving instructor, he competes, he jumps solo- INSANE! (Check out this history-making solo jump of his and/or this ABC News clip)
Even with the vast wealth of knowledge on skydiving that I possess – having two cancelled trips to my name and all – I was FLOORED. The guy is just spewing stats and facts about cheating death, effortlessly emitting terms like “tandem jump” and “jet stream” and “terminal velocity”. Say WHAT?! He’s broken countless bones, had operation after operation, had to re-learn how to WALK, and still keeps going. I was just speechless. How could he do all that and be sitting in this room with me? I kept saying how stunned I was by how non-chalant he was as he spoke about all of this. NONE of us have that experience, and to just treat it like “meh”? Nothin’? No biggie? (Cue the rant)
Our assignment was from FRINGE, an almost-monologue by a non-descript character talking very vaguely about mysterious, unknown events that were super high-stakes and relevant to plot without us knowing how, why, when, or where. (JJ Abrams rules!!!) As a whole, we were just okay. I struggled tremendously, I have no qualms admitting. Lotsa traps! The big trap? This lil’ monologue-y chunk where the character reveals a bit of dramatic back-story, filled with weird innuendos and imagery. We ALL played the dramatic back-story and weird innuendo and imagery and it KILLED it! Suddenly, I thought about Geoff’s skydiving stories and immediately thought to myself – that’s how we kill auditions!
We simply cannot make big deals out of deals that are already big. If our character goes all Drama School and ACTS heavy and weird, what he’s telling us becomes less heavy and weird, which kills the whole point of his dialogue! He’s lived this life his entire life! So when he tells us about it there wouldn’t be any acting or pantomime or hand gestures or massaging of words – he’d spit it out! It’s already engrained in him, it’s part of who he is, he doesn’t think about it when he talks about it, he just KNOWS it. We know how to walk and open doorknobs and brush our teeth without having to narrate it and show it to people, right? We just do it! And Geoff??? The guy is a death-defier! Every day! All day! What the fuck, right??
When he talks about it? It’s nothing. It’s just his life, it’s just what he does, it’s just what he knows like the back of his hand. And that’s the thing with these roles from the hour-long dramas and procedurals, with their law and their crime and their psychology and DNA and all that over-our-heads stuff that intimidates mere mortals (“viewers”) – it’s just what these characters do and live every day. Their job is their job. It’s obviously a big deal to them- it’s their income, their education, their work, their lives! That’s why when they discuss it all – via the dialogue in the sides we receive for our auditions!- they can’t make an epic deal out of what they say. It’s just who they are and what they do. This doesn’t mean that it’s not a big deal, it’s just that the big deals in life are already big and don’t need us to try and ACT them INTO being so is all. No need for additional gravity, the script’s got plenty of heavy, thanks!
Mastering this material is not about memorizing – it’s about being enveloped by the stuff. Our brains learn and absorb in so many ways- we see, we hear, we read, we listen, we write, we play, we mimic. That is what couch time and rehearsals are for, to bulk up our right brain cuz our left brain is such an overzealous attention-whore that we go into creative experiences like auditions with a lopsided brain. Our goal is, not to “memorize” or “get it perfect” or “find the right way to do it”, but to see and experience material and text and character-thoughts from all angles so that we just GET IT and don’t need to “act” or “show” anything. All we have to do is take what we know from the TEXT and the text ALONE, then tunnel our way to the center of our right brain with it and see what happens. How do we get there? WE PLAY! The right brain is simple and child-like! We have huuuuuge stakes, we do impressions, we do stupid accents, and we dare to suck! Once we’re in there the right brain is a hall of mirrors that allows us to see whatever we brought with us from every angle imaginable. And THEN? The popcorn popper starts and thoughts begin poppin’ up all over the fuckin’ place! Then our cohorts on the COUCH will help pick out those thoughts that best fit the material, genre, our essence, etc.
I won’t BS and say it’s easy; if it were, everyone would just do it. So how do you excel at something that is so effortlessly described? Well, when I asked Geoff how the hell he managed to become such an elite skydiver his answer was simply, “I just started doing it every day; I jump eight times a day now sometimes.” If one can manage to jump out of and freefall from a PLANE at 120 mph eight times a day, why can’t WE ever find time to rehearse two pages of sides?!?! We absolutely can, and so I say- it’s time to just jump, folks!
- Scott Borden, Editor
